by guest blogger Michelle May, MD, author of Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat with Diabetes

The response to Paula Deen's revelation that she has Type 2 diabetes highlights the false "either-or" dilemma that plagues our culture's approach to eating (and most other things): good or bad, right or wrong, all or nothing.

Paula Deen's popular brand was based on her audacious use of ingredients that are "evil" in this dichotomous view of healthy eating. Viewers watched in fascination and vicarious enjoyment as this sweet but naughty woman unabashedly broke "the rules." Now some of her critics are angry that she hasn't fallen to her knees, begged our forgiveness, and sworn off butter and sugar forever to pay penance and set an example for all the other sinners she led astray.

This all or nothing thinking has characterized yo-yo dieting for decades. At first, dieters are highly motivated to adhere to a strict diet of "good" food. Eventually, feelings of deprivation set in, leading to preoccupation and cravings for "bad" food, increasing sensitivity to temptations, giving in, guilt and consequently, overeating. I call this predictable pattern the eat repent repeat cycle.

by Raychelle Cassada Lohmann, MS, LPC, author of The Anger Workbook for Teens

Do you counsel parents who are at their wit's end with a child who throws tantrums, destroys things, or is defiant? If so, here's some information for parents that can help.

Children are constantly soaking in what's going on around them. Studies are showing that even when parents don't think that their kids listen, they do. Parents are one of the strongest influences in a child's life. They set the bar. So be sure that parents are modeling appropriate anger management skills. Besides being the model of behavior, parents should teach children specific skills to manage anger.

by guest blogger Randi Gunther, PhD, author of Relationship Saboteurs and When Love Stumbles

The media hype about older women seeking out young men for sexual contact has about worn me down. As a relationship therapist for four decades, I have certainly defended many unfairly labeled "dirty old men," who were just guys who fell in love with younger women for their beauty, energy, and potential for having children. Many of my older male patients have wanted to start families again and have created great second marriages.

Now I have a whole new group of valuable people to defend. In the past several years, I've had the pleasure of working with older women in relationships with often much younger men. They are not the "older women who frequent clubs to score sexually with younger men," as the new, and unfair definition is of "Cougars." They are quality, mature women who have been actively sought after by younger men for long-term, committed relationships. Yes, sex is an important part of their relationship, but there is so much more.

Michelle Skeen, PsyD, introduces her new book, The Critical Partner, which uses Schema Theory as a framework for learning new things about yourself and your partner. Check it out:

Quick Tip for Therapists by Martin M. Antony, PhD, author of Overcoming Health Anxiety and Jenny Rogojanski, MA

Changing behavior can be extremely challenging for clients, and finding ways to reinforce progress between sessions can be critical for successful therapy. In particular, the client's environment, culture, or social context may act as a barrier to making changes outside of the therapy session. One strategy that may be helpful for overcoming this is to include a supportive family member or close friend as a "helper" who can motivate the client to make changes between sessions. At times, a client's partner may not support the client's efforts to change, which can interfere with progress. In these cases, it is particularly important to get the client's partner on board.

by guest blogger Olga Trujillo, author of The Sum of My Parts

My father, or Popi, as I called him when I was a child, did not speak English, only Spanish. My mother (Mame) also spoke Spanish as her first language, but she could speak English, too--even though she had a strong accent. My brothers and I learned Spanish first and only later learned English in school. We grew up in a traditional Latino home - well, sort of. We spoke only Spanish at home, ate foods that reflected my mother's Caribbean roots, believed in God, went to Catholic Church every Sunday, and our earliest teachers were the nuns of our local Catholic School.

My parents taught us about familia ("family"). According to my father, only one thing was more important than familia, and that was God. It wasn't until much later in my life that I noticed that my dad didn't really have any family besides us, really.

by guest blogger Suzanne Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP, co-author of Healing Together

No one just shows up for a good relationship and relationships don’t just get better because time passes. It is what we do during that time that helps heal and enhance our relationships. Over the last few years I have written many blogs for couples. Here are six simple resolutions drawn from them that many have found enhance the bond they share with their partner.

by guest blogger Elisha Goldstein, PhD, author of A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook

Here’s what I’m thinking about when starting this next year of 2012:

"May we all recognize in this New Year that the moments of our lives are rare and precious. Open to them, Bask in them, We are alive."

The reality is we often hold things that are rare in our world to be precious. These rare things are held to a high value, whether it’s gold, an unbroken sand dollar on a beach, or the short time that a baby is a baby before growing up.

If you peel the lens back for a moment you can see our lives in this very same way. We’re a blip in time in relation to the life of this planet we stand on and this Universe we live in. All the moments of our lives are rare and precious and it’s incredibly important to bring that awareness back to our lives.

by guest blogger Stephanie Sarkis, PhD, author of 10 Simple Solutions to Adult ADD, 2nd ed.: How to Overcome Chronic Distraction and Accomplish Your Goals

Here’s what I’m thinking about when starting this next year of 2012:

There's a trick to keeping your resolutions. It's amazingly simple, yet so effective. Ready?

Tell people about your resolutions.

That's it.

Why is this so effective? Because you've now taken your resolutions from private to public. Now people know.

excerpt from Present Perfect by Pavel Somov, PhD

Imagination is always at least one step ahead of reality. When we appraise the world, ourselves, or others, we compare what is (the real) with what theoretically could be (the imagined).

Say you got a B on a test. You look at this grade and you think that you could have done better, that you could have gotten an A. But that’s theory. The reality is that you got a B, not an A, and this B represented your practical (not theoretical) best.

With this in mind, let me ask you this: what do you mean by perfection—the theoretical best or the practical best? When you think about perfection, are you thinking about the imaginary perfection of what could be or about the perfection of what actually is? Of course, this is something of a rhetorical question. I know the answer: as a perfectionist, you define perfection as a theoretical best. That’s exactly why you are never satisfied with reality as it is.