How do you protect yourself from absorbing too much of your clients’ suffering?

by Sameet Kumar, Ph.D.

Being a witness to suffering can be challenging. A few skills continue to be indispensable in helping me not absorb the intense suffering I witness as my clients face cancer-related death, grief, and loss.

In session, practice mindfulness skills. Keep the rhythm of your breathing relaxed, allowing your belly to rise and fall as you inhale and exhale. This will help to diminish your cognitive and physical stress while staying present for the content and affect of the sessions. In staying present, you may paradoxically help to remove the intensity and distress of vicarious suffering.

Outside of session, find colleagues or peers to decompress with. Burnout and fatigue can be as much a function of who your colleagues are as much as what kinds of clients you have. I have also found that practicing regular wellness routines can be life- and career- changing. One of the reasons I love my job is specifically because it forces me to exercise regularly, meditate daily, and seek emotional balance in my own life.

Taken together, helping yourself so you can help others can remind you of the positive impact that you can have on people going through the darkest times of their lives.

Learn more about Sameet Kumar and his books.