Millions of women ask themselves the same question every day. They wonder whether their husband or boyfriend's short temper, tendency to withdraw, and mysterious physical complaints might be signs of some deeper problem. Is he depressed, they wonder, or what? The tricky part of recognizing male depression is that, very often, it doesn't look like depression at all. Depressed guys often mask their depression with workaholism or substance abuse. Sometimes they withdraw from their relationships or lash out in defensive (and sometimes aggressive) ways.

If you think the man in your life is struggling with depression, this book can help you recognize his symptoms and encourage him in overcoming his depressed feelings. The book will also show you how to take care of yourself and not get lost in his depression. It provides a range of strategies you can use to communicate with him effectively, cope with his physical symptoms like insomnia and sexual dysfunction, and rebuild intimacy in your relationship. Ultimately, the book offers compassionate (if sometimes firm) advice to help you do what's best for him, for yourself, and for your relationship.

Step-by-step advice to help you:
• Distinguish between typical and male-type depression
• Connect and communicate with a depressed guy
• Help him make the most of psychological and medical treatment
• Negotiate issues of sexual and emotional intimacy
• Set safe boundaries and take care of yourself

…Is He Depressed or What? will save a lot of marriages and a lot of lives.
-Frank S. Pittman III, MD, author of Man Enough: Fathers, Sons, and The Search for Masculinity

Wexler gives us a uniquely useful guide for the partners of depressed men, men whose symptoms may not include sadness and whose coping skills may not include talking about it. Wexler's descriptions of desperately hypermasculine 'manhood attacks' will be particularly enlightening for the beleaguered, bewildered mates of men who turn mean or wild and for the men themselves. Is He Depressed or What? will save a lot of marriages and a lot of lives.
-Frank S. Pittman III, MD, author of Man Enough: Fathers, Sons, and the Search for Masculinity

Is He Depressed or What? is invaluable for anyone who is in a relationship with a depressed man. Wexler's style is approachable yet grounded in common sense. He balances giving the reader specific tools and strategies, both for themselves and the person struggling with depression. I recommend it highly.
-Rosalind Wiseman, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes