Wired for Dating
How Understanding Neurobiology and Attachment Style Can Help You Find Your Ideal Mate
Published by: New Harbinger Publications
Imprint: New Harbinger Publications
In the age of online dating, finding a real connection can seem more daunting than ever! So, why not stack the odds of finding the right person in your favor? This book offers simple, proven-effective principles drawn from neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find the perfect mate.
Everybody wants someone to love and spend time with, and searching for your ideal partner is a natural and healthy human tendency. Just about everyone dates at some point in their lives, yet few really understand what they're doing or how to get the best results. In Wired for Dating, psychologist and relationship expert Stan Tatkin—author of Wired for Love—offers powerful tips based in neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find a compatible mate and go on to create a fabulous relationship.
Using real-life scenarios, you’ll learn key concepts about how people become attracted to potential partners, move toward or away from commitment, and the important role the brain and nervous system play in this process. Each chapter explores the scientific concepts of attachment theory, arousal regulation, and neuroscience. And with a little practice, you’ll learn to apply these exercises and practical techniques to your dating life.
If you’re ready to get serious (or not!) about dating, meet your match, and have more fun, this book will be your guide.
“Bravo, Stan Tatkin, for writing a truly useful book about dating: what to look for; how to handle Internet dating sites; what to know about yourself; how to vet potential partners; and how to proceed in a level-headed fashion toward finding life’s greatest prize—a long-term successful partnership. Moreover, it’s got poetry, a grounded understanding of neuroscience and attachment theory, excellent questions and exercises, and really smart advice. I learned a lot. It’s a special book.”
—Helen Fisher, PhD, biological anthropologist at Rutgers University, chief scientific advisor to the Internet dating site www.match.com, and author of Why Him? Why Her?, Why We Love, Anatomy of Love, The First Sex, and The Sex Contract
“People entering into relationships today need this book more than ever. Wired for Dating goes beyond simply being a guide on increasing your chances of successful dating; Stan Tatkin, PsyD, provides a science-based approach filled with valuable insights and techniques that can give us the ability to create more enduring and richer relationships. This book can transform the culture we live in today!”
—Elisha Goldstein, PhD, cofounder of The Center for Mindful Living in Los Angeles, CA, and author of Uncovering Happiness
“Perhaps nothing is as pivotal in creating enduring and satisfying relationships as the intricate dance of dating. Stan Tatkin has found a way to make the complexities of this elusive process clear, without diluting the science and clinical practice that inform this central life issue. Wired for Dating is a flexible and supportive guide for those running the relationship gauntlet, as well as a significant contribution to emotionally based therapies.”
—Peter A. Levine, PhD, author of Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma, and In an Unspoken Voice
“Where was Stan Tatkin when I was dating? I highly recommend Wired for Dating to anyone who is ready for a secure-functioning relationship. Tatkin addresses the scientific, psychobiological, neurobiological, and intricate ways of the nervous system within the realm of dating, and does so in an utterly readable, practically applicable, wise, and entertaining way.”
—Alanis Morissette, artist and activist
“If you are thinking about starting to date, are excited about a person you recently met, or have met the love of your life, you will find reading this book an eye-opening experience. Stan Tatkin has succeeded in integrating attachment and neuroscience research as he takes us on a wonderful journey through the worlds of dating, mating, and love.”
—Marion F. Solomon, PhD, author of Narcissism and Intimacy and Lean on Me
“Meeting and coming together with a mate doesn’t have to be a happenstance affair. In Wired for Dating, Stan Tatkin lays out what you need to know and specifically what you can do to have the best chances of success in a relationship. Expert advice for people of all ages and all shades of prior experience who are serious about finding happiness in a lasting long-term relationship.”
—Bill O’Hanlon, coauthor of Love is a Verb and Rewriting Love Stories
“Stan Tatkin’s Wired for Dating is a wonderful, supportive guide to self- and relationship discovery. It is filled with nuggets of wisdom that make it easy to answer some of the toughest dating questions. Using Tatkin’s psychobiological approach, you can navigate dating with much more grace. You have a way to identify serious red flags, as well as the exercises and skills to build a long-term successful partnership. Now you can choose a life partner with confidence and the clarity that you are right for each other. Reading Wired for Dating is one of the most important decisions you will make in your mating life.”
—Ellyn Bader, PhD, cofounder of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, CA
“Stan Tatkin’s marvelous and intelligent guide gives you the total map when you seek a partner worthy of your efforts and ask the important question, ‘Is this the right one for me?’ Tatkin shows you how to use both sides of your powerful brain and finally make the right decision. The heart meets science, and you’re the winner. He takes the mystery out of dating so you can enjoy the mystery of being with the person you really love. Now you can date with a safety net, and enjoy the journey as the genuine magic happens.”
—Peter Pearson, PhD, cofounder of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, CA
“Stan Tatkin is one of the most important voices in couple relationships today. His knowledge is grounded in research, packed with practicality, and sprinkled with a unique blend of wisdom and wit. Take the time to read Wired for Dating; you will be rewarded with inspiration and insight.”
—Pat Love, EdD, LMFT, coauthor of How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
“Stan Takin is one of the leading figures in relationship counseling. In Wired for Dating, he explains partnership science so that readers can create a secure, meaningful relationship. Study this book before commencing your relationship journey so you have a map for success. Learn these methods when you are partnered to chart its continuation. Easy to read, eminently practical.”
—Jeffrey K. Zeig, PhD, founder and CEO of The Milton H. Erickson Foundation