When Your Daughter Has BPD
Essential Skills to Help Families Manage Borderline Personality Disorder
Published by: New Harbinger Publications
Imprint: New Harbinger Publications
In this groundbreaking book, psychologist Daniel Lobel offers essential skills based in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to help you understand your daughter’s disorder, define appropriate boundaries, put an end to daily emergencies, and rebuild the family’s structure from the ground up.
If you have a daughter with borderline personality disorder (BPD), you may feel frustration, shame, and your family may be at the breaking point dealing with angry outbursts, threats, and constant emergencies. You may even feel guilty for not enjoying spending time with your child—but how can you when her behavior is abusive toward you and the rest of your family? You need solid skills you can use now to help your daughter and hold your family together.
In this important guide, you’ll learn real solutions and strategies based in proven-effective DBT and CBT to help you weather the storm of BPD and restore a sense of normalcy and balance in your life. You’ll find an overview of BPD so you can better understand the driving forces behind your daughter’s difficult behavior. You’ll discover how you can help your daughter get the help she needs while also setting boundaries that foster respect and self-care for you and others in your family. And, most importantly, you’ll learn “emergency parenting techniques” to help you put a stop to abusive patterns and restore peace.
If your daughter has BPD and your family is struggling to make it through each day, this book offers essential skills to help you cope and recover a sense of stability.
1. Definitions and Development of BPD
2. Effects of BPD on the Family
3. A Primer of Parenting Skills
4. Step 1: Stop the Bleeding
5. Step 2: End Codependency and Enabling
6. Step 3: Healing and Forgiveness
7. The New Family Structure
8. What You Can Do to Help Your Daughter
9. What You Can’t Do to Help Your Daughter
10. Transgenerational Effects—When Your Child
Becomes a Parent
“Daniel S. Lobel nails it. In clear language, he vividly depicts the struggles a family undergoes when a daughter has borderline personality disorder (BPD). Do not think drug treatments alone will suffice, or that a magical moment will change everything. What Lobel makes transparent is how necessary sound psychology is and how, properly applied, we now know enough to expect a happy outcome. Do not be intimidated by psychiatry or your daughter. This book masterfully lays out how to proceed and what is necessary to grasp.”
—Arnold Wilson, PhD, training and supervising psychoanalyst at the Institute for Psychoanalytic Training and Research (IPTAR), and lecturer in psychiatry at Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons
“Daniel S. Lobel has crafted a practical guide to help parents deal with an illness that is extremely difficult to treat. He offers realistic, positive, and compassionate suggestions to maximize success in parenting a daughter with BPD, and addresses not only her struggles but those of the parents and family as well. It is a valuable tool for those of us who are trying to understand the challenges we face.”
“If your child—whether young or grown—suffers from BPD, you are suffering as well. That’s because this problem affects the entire family, and requires specialized parenting skills. Using case examples and an easy-to-understand approach, Daniel S. Lobel has produced a handbook that can change countless lives.”
—Mark R. Banschick, MD, child and adolescent psychiatrist and author of The Intelligent Divorce