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Mindful Discipline

Mindful Discipline
A Loving Approach to Setting Limits and Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child




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ISBN: 9781608828845
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$17.95In Stock
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About the Book

Raising happy, compassionate, and responsible children requires both love and limits. In Mindful Discipline, internationally recognized mindfulness expert Shauna Shapiro and pediatrician Chris White weave together ancient wisdom and modern science to provide new perspectives on parenting and discipline.

Grounded in mindfulness and neuroscience, this pioneering book redefines discipline and outlines the five essential elements necessary for children to thrive: unconditional love, space for children to be themselves, mentorship, healthy boundaries, and mis-takes that create learning and growth opportunities. In this book, you will also discover parenting practices such as setting limits with love, working with difficult emotions, and forgiveness and compassion meditations that place discipline within a context of mindfulness. This relationship-centered approach will restore your confidence as a parent and support your children in developing emotional intelligence, self-discipline, and resilience-qualities they need for living an authentic and meaningful life.


Shauna Shapiro (Author)
Shauna Shapiro, PhD, is a professor at Santa Clara University, a clinical psychologist, an internationally recognized expert in mindfulness, and a mother. With twenty years of meditation experience studying in Thailand and Nepal,... Read more

Books by Shauna Shapiro

Chris White (Author)
Chris White, M.D., is a board-certified pediatrician, parent educator, and life coach. He is the creator and director of Essential Parenting, an organization that supports the psycho-emotional development of children and their parents. Chris lives... Read more

Books by Chris White

Christine Carter (Foreword by)
Foreword writer Christine Carter, PhD, is a happiness expert, sociologist, and the author of Raising Happiness: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kidsand Happier Parents. Carter has helped thousands of people find more joy in their... Read more

Books by Christine Carter

Dean Ornish (Foreword by)

Books by Dean Ornish


“This reader-friendly book is a masterful guide for parents. With great gentleness and humility, Mindful Discipline weaves together the rigor of science, the wisdom of reflection, and decades of clinical experience, offering parents one of the most exceptional road maps on how to raise happy, resilient, and emotionally healthy children.”
-Andrew Weil, MD, author of Spontaneous Happiness and Eight Weeks to Optimum Health

“If you raise your children with respect for who they are, nourishing compassion, clarity, and wise limits, they will bloom and blossom. The tools for mindfully doing so are here in these pages.”
-Jack Kornfield, PhD, author of A Path with Heart
“I'm deeply impressed and inspired by what [Shapiro and White] are offering the world! It fills such an essential niche, and moves forward our understanding of `how to' in an important way.”
-Tara Brach, PhD, author of Radical Acceptance and True Refuge
“This intelligent, tender, and beautifully written book helps parents tap into their inner wisdom and create the optimal emotional environment for their child's growth and development. Loaded with powerful exercises grounded in clinical expertise and scientific theory, this book will help all of us navigate the path of parenting with greater ease, clarity, and grace.”
-Kristin Neff, PhD, associate professor of human development and culture at the University of Texas at Austin and author of Self-Compassion
“Coming from an expert on mindfulness and a leading pediatrician, this deeply wise book shows parents how to nourish both self-discipline and self-worth inside the children they love. Grounded in research, full of personal examples, and loaded with down-to-earth suggestions, this book is a gem.”
-Rick Hanson, PhD, author of Hardwiring Happiness
“Shauna Shapiro and Chris White have created a wonderful integration of the power of mindful awareness and the insights from studies of child development and the brain to lovingly guide us to a more rewarding and effective way of being as parents. The science of attachment reveals that the most robust predictor of our child's development is how we have come to make sense of our lives from the inside out. This book beautifully illuminates how the previously independent fields of attachment and of mindfulness actually share common ground-that knowing yourself is the best gift you can give to your children. An effective way of achieving this parental presence is through mindfulness, and the stories, ideas, and exercises of Mindful Discipline offer a fabulous guide to creating the deep and receptive internal knowing that will empower your children to become resilient, reflective, and compassionate beings themselves. What better gift can you offer of yourself to your child, and the world?”
-Daniel J. Siegel, MD, clinical professor at the University of California, Los Angeles, school of medicine; author of Brainstorm and The Mindful Brain; and coauthor of No-Drama Discipline, Parenting from the Inside Out, and The Whole-Brain Child
Mindful Discipline should be read by every parent. This book contains the operating instructions for family life that none of us received in school. Twenty-five years ago mindfulness saved my life. Now it informs all of my actions, including the way I am with my children.”
-Noah Levine, author of Dharma Punx and Refuge Recovery
“This finely and sensitively written book points to the fragility and resilience of a child's soul and demonstrates so clearly how in need each child is of an equally fragile and resilient adult's guidance. An adult, however, having been on the Earth much longer, has been able to add experience to the fragility and resilience and thus becomes the author of the child's life until he or she is experienced enough to become the author himself or herself. This beautiful book is a wonderful guide to parents who wish to lovingly, mindfully, and clearly accompany their children at the beginning of their life journey.”
-Meinir Davies, management and teaching team coordinator at the New Village School, Sausalito, CA
Mindful Discipline is the perfect guide for conscious parents and teachers. Grounded in solid neuroscience, it shows how to be loving and remain centered, while teaching children to develop their own internal wisdom and good hearts. This book is a gift!”
-James Baraz, cofounder of Spirit Rock Meditation Center and coauthor of Awakening Joy: 10 Steps to Happiness
Mindful Discipline is an intelligent and creative approach to the omnipresent challenge of parenting: how to be kind and loving yet firm and in control. I was struck by the multiple levels of authority the authors drew upon: deep scholarship, personal struggles with parenting, and hard-earned meditative insight.”
-Fred Luskin, PhD, director of the Stanford Forgiveness Project and author of Forgive for Good
“Using the word `discipline' to mean self-regulation in alignment with personal values, this gentle handbook teaches parents Buddhist-style practices of mindfulness as a basis to access their own wisdom and meet their children's needs with the right mix of love and limits. Clinical psychologist Shapiro (The Art and Science of Mindfulness) and pediatrician White see the process of parenting as having five essential elements: the yin factors of unconditional love and space to build autonomy and competence balance the yang factors of mentorship and healthy boundaries, and the lessons in humility and forgiveness that come from our `mis-takes.' ... Shapiro and White's commitment to balanced parenting gives readers motivation to become strong role models.”
-Publishers Weekly

“Mindfulness expert Shapiro and pediatrician White describe a holistic system in which parents improve their child's behavior and promote cooperation while at the same time fostering motivation, emotional intelligence, self-esteem, and resilience. The authors offer five elements of mindful discipline: unconditional love, space for children to be themselves, mentorship and transfer of values, and the admission of one's own mistakes. The carefulness edge takes place, the authors say, when parents develop their own self-awareness and can adopt their child's perspective. This enables the child to choose the best course of action based on the competing needs of the moment, instead of their own history. . Combining parenting skills with the practice of mindfulness is genius. Essential for anyone raising a family.”
-Library Journal starred review

“The wonderful, authoritative, generous, and warm-hearted guidance offered by these two skilled parents, educators, and researchers confirms that the medium is indeed the message. This book, unique in a world of instruction manuals, engages, encourages, and inspires parents both old and new to trust their own inherent goodness and kindness to connect with the impulse to flourish that is part of every child's potential, so that parenting and growing up-the most basic of experiences-become a sacred joy! What a treasure this book will be to so many people!”
-Sylvia Boorstein, author of Happiness Is an Inside Job: Practicing for a Joyful Life

“From the opening pages, Mindful Discipline is practical, authentic, and compassionate. The authors simultaneously support our deepest desires as parents and acknowledge the messy realities of parenting. They offer guiding principles, specific practices, and, most importantly, heartfelt compassion for all of us engaged in the moment-to-moment process of creating healthy, loving relationships with our children. This book is a valuable resource for me personally, and for the parents, children, and families I serve.”
-Amy Saltzman MD, author of A Still Quiet Place

“Drawing from their own experience as parents, plus many great teachers of our time, White and Shapiro give us invaluable insights and personal practices to understand and embody the process of parenting in order to raise loving, conscious humans. This in-depth and thoughtful book weaves the principles of parenting with precise instructions for self-inquiry so that both parent and child thrive in the relationship.”
-Lindy Woodard, MD, Pediatric Alternatives, Mill Valley, CA

“The wisdom in this book rings true for me on so many levels-as a psychologist, scientist, mindfulness scholar, and most of all, a parent. In a gentle and accessible manner, Shapiro and White use both science and wisdom to explain exactly how to hold firm boundaries and loving limits while being authentic, present, and compassionate-blending these ingredients into a recipe for creating a harmonious home and being the kind of parent all of us aspire to be.”
-Cassandra Vieten, PhD, president of the Institute of Noetic Sciences and author of Mindful Motherhood

“Whether parents have an established mindfulness practice or are new to this ancient wisdom, Mindful Discipline readers will gain a fresh and confident approach to parenting and a life based in mindfulness. This book's easy-to-read chapters offer valuable parenting advice rooted in psychology and practical exercises readers can use to take their parenting to the next level.”
-Sarah Wood Vallely, author of Sensational Meditation for Children

“Are you tired of using discipline techniques that strain your parent-child relationship and only offer short-term results? Mindful Discipline is an insightful and inspiring book designed to help parents respond calmly and thoughtfully to behavior challenges, and provide the love, guidance, and appropriate boundaries children need. Shauna Shapiro and Chris White show us how a mindful awareness practice, along with the essential elements of Mindful Discipline, can lead to self-growth, deeper connection with our children, and a greater understanding of children's underlying needs.”
-Katie Vasicek, MA, parent coach (www.vistaparenting.com)

“Parenting may be the most difficult job on the planet. It also may be the most joyful and rewarding thing a person can do. Shapiro and White have drawn upon science, theory, and their deep well of experience to craft a practical and meaningful guide for fostering the growth of loving, emotionally intelligent, and responsible children. I am certain that parents who put into practice the wisdom found in Mindful Discipline will be offering a blessing to their child for life.”
-Steven D. Hickman, PsyD, clinical psychologist and executive director at the University of California, San Diego's Center for Mindfulness

“Beautifully written. Mindful Discipline puts the research-validated elements of good parenting-loving unconditionally, supporting autonomy, mentoring healthy habits, setting healthy boundaries, and reframing mistakes as learning opportunities-into the context of conscious and compassionate coaching, teaching parents to guide children in their natural developmental trajectory from impulse to judgment to responsibility. Shapiro and White offer simple, practical tools that develop the capacities of emotional intelligence, resilience, and self-discipline that grow an authentic inner compass of responsibility and integrity for both parent and child. I'm recommending the book wholeheartedly to every parent and parent-to-be; it's a masterful gem.”
-Linda Graham, MFT, author of Bouncing Back: Rewiring Your Brain for Maximum Resilience and Well-Being

“Who doesn't want independent and loving children? In Mindful Discipline, Shapiro and White provide us with principles and tools to create a harmonious family life and self-disciplined children.”
-Victoria Maizes, MD, executive director at the Arizona Center for Integrative Medicine and author of Be Fruitful: The Essential Guide to Maximizing Fertility and Giving Birth to a Healthy Child

“Sigmund Freud called parenting `an impossible profession.' In the midst of our self-help culture's overly simple solutions to the complex challenges of contemporary lives, Mindful Discipline speaks to those facing this impossible task with kindness, deep wisdom, and refreshing sanity. Digesting the essence of the latest research and theory, it also clearly sees the messy living rooms of contemporary parents aspiring to bring their highest consciousness to the sometimes exhausting daily realities of parenting. It invites you to always keep growing, as best you can, together with your kids. Your family will never be perfect, but your mindfulness, and your emotional intelligence, can always be developing. That's real; and it's more than enough to give your kids what they really need, especially when fueled by the compassion and wisdom you'll contact in these pages.
-Terry Patten, senior author, with Ken Wilber, of Integral Spiritual Practice

“Drawing from their own experience as parents, plus many great teachers of our time, Shapiro and White give us invaluable insights and personal practices to understand and embody the process of parenting in order to raise loving, conscious humans. This in-depth and thoughtful book weaves the principles of parenting with precise instructions for self-inquiry so that both parent and child thrive in the relationship.”
-Lindy Woodard, MD, pediatrician and mother of two

“We all know that parenting is wonderful, difficult, mysterious, and challenging. This skillfully crafted book offers an insightful view of parenting as an opportunity to practice mindfulness and awareness. You will find helpful and accessible practices for cultivating clarity, compassion, and resilience for both parent and child. There are many gems, like reframing mistakes to `mis-takes'-a great gift.”
-Wendy Palmer, author of The Intuitive Body: Discovering the Wisdom of Conscious Embodiment and Aikido

“If discipline in the home is important to you, Mindful Discipline is a must-read! Combining real-life examples with plenty of research-based concepts, authors Shapiro and White make a clear distinction between healthy and unhealthy discipline. They also offer a variety of tools and techniques to help you practice healthy, loving discipline while avoiding its unhealthy forms. It is rare to find a book on discipline that places so much emphasis on the heart of the parent-child relationship.”
-Scott Noelle, author of The Daily Groove: How to Enjoy Parenting . Unconditionally!

Mindful Discipline offers invaluable insights into the dynamics of child-and-parent relationships, as well as student-and-learning-companion relationships. Shapiro and White's profound understanding of children's needs perfectly complements the child-centered education of the New Learning Culture approach. It's a must-read for all who aim to be loving mentors for their kids and students.”
-Carmen Gamper, founder of New Learning Culture

“Shapiro and White's book is an extraordinary resource that will transform the way parents think. Mindful Discipline empowers parents and children, striking the perfect balance between love and limits. The explanatory research and hands-on, practical strategies offer a masterful guide to parenting through mindfulness.”
-Laura L. Ellingson, coauthor (with Patricia Sotirin) of Aunting: Cultural Practices that Sustain Family and Community Life

“A rich and wonderful book on how to nourish strength, integrity, and character in one's children; the authors have made a truly important contribution for all those who love their children.”
-Joan Halifax, PhD, Abbot Upaya Zen Center

“Shapiro and White weave a tapestry of ancient wisdom and current developmental knowledge to give us a gentle guide to becoming the loving parents our children need when it counts the most.”
-Gordon Neufeld, PhD

“This is a jewel of a book that contains priceless pearls of wisdom. Shapiro and White have written a wonderfully clear and inspiring guide to raising healthy, happy, and emotionally intelligent children. Drawing on the practice of mindfulness and contemporary scientific research, Mindful Discipline is filled with expert guidance, experiential practices, and personal stories that masterfully illuminate the way. Every parent should read this book!”
-Mark Coleman, author of Awake in the Wild

“What an insightful book! With its focus on attitudes, approaches, and intuition rather than on strict rules, children brought up with Mindful Discipline are bound to find a harmonious balance between head and heart, strength and softness, curiosity and safety. I love it!”
-Peter Baumann, founder of Being Human

“How fortunate parents are to have this courageous and much needed perspective on nurturing their children so that they may grow up to be happy, resilient, and emotionally intelligent adults who are able to work with life's inevitable challenges-and how fortunate children are to have parents who might be guided by the words of wisdom written here! Synthesizing contemporary understanding about what children truly need and mindfulness practices for nurturing love and connection, Shapiro and White have written a clear and fundamentally kind book that encourages parents to trust themselves and their children in the ever-evolving process of growing and learning together, moment-by-moment.”
-Nancy Bardacke, midwife, mindfulness teacher, and author of Mindful Birthing: Training the Mind, Body and Heart for Childbirth and Beyond

Mindful Discipline is an interesting, encouraging, and enlightening contribution to the library of books on parenting. I really appreciate its focus on relationships, starting with a foundation of parental self-discovery and self-discipline. The concepts are thought provoking and the applications and examples are sound and effective. Children and parents will find mutual respect, learning, and joy from this approach, with all parties growing and developing into happier individuals and better citizens. I congratulate the authors on their good work!”
-Chet D. Johnson, MD, FAAP, professor of pediatrics and associate director for the Center for Child Health and Development, University of Kansas School of Medicine

“Kids need discipline. While that may be conventional thinking in parenting, it doesn't tell the whole story. Living in an age of distraction and chronic stress, we are raising children with more screen time, less face-to-face time, more control, less connection, more anxiety, less peace and joy, and more punishment with less discipline. Mindful Discipline shines a compassionate light on why true discipline is not punitive, but intuitive-not controlling but rooted in healthy connection, and shows us why parenting our children to thrive is about honoring the purpose of your relationship: to grow together. If mindfulness is the heart's discipline, to pay attention, to notice, to connect inside our storms and repair our ruptures, then, we are, in effect, creating a discipline of the heart, and in so doing, we revitalize the heart of healthy family because we understand the truth about what kids-and we-truly need to thrive. An important book.”
-Lu Hanessian, award-winning writer; author of Let the Baby Drive and The Garden: A Parenting Parable; former NBC and Discovery Health Channel anchor; parent educator; speaker; and founder of Parent2ParentU.com and WYSH (Wear Your Spirit for Humanity)

"Combining parenting skills with the practice of mindfulness is genius. Essential for anyone raising a family."
-Library Journal Starred Review

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